Who of us, women, did not dream that our love would last a lifetime, and family would be strong and unbroken? Everything can become reality!

Marriage can be compared to a journey on an unfamiliar road. On the way you meet pits and bumps. And not to land in a ditch, you need to learn maneuvering.

There are simple rules, which remain unchanged regardless of path you have already gone. Applying these rules in practice is not always easy, but vitally important. If you observe them, your marriage will become stronger, and then its good sides, such as intimacy, trust and affection, will be felt in full.

1. Do not let the feeling fade away

Boredom, frustration and irritation can extinguish the last spark of love, even where flame of passion blazed earlier. Therefore, you need to learn to bring all good things for the first plan. Here’s how to do it.

Above all, remember that in order to gain advantage over one negative statement, 20 affirmative ones are required. Conclusion: more positive, less negative. Tell wife how you like her new shoes, or make a compliment to husband about his new shirt.

Make sure that these words of thanks were sincere and specific: «I can always count on you, because thanks to you, my car is always on the go and in excellent condition». «What a great tablecloth - you know how to create comfort». Making a compliment or smiling, have a look at your spouse’s eyes.

Very soon you will see that there is no inappropriate time for small signs of love. Coming home, embrace and kiss husband, so that he would know how happy you are to see him. On a rainy Sunday morning surprise wife pleasantly, serve coffee in bed. Always keep in mind merits of your half and try not to focus on weaknesses. Taking out a garbage can, do not grumble, but look at a spouse with a smile. And make yourself a rule to give each other a long, sensual kiss before going to bed.

2. Keep in touch

Touches of close people contribute to formulation of endorphines, causing pleasant sensations in both partners.

Gentle touches will strengthen your union. It is very important, as a united couple will endure any hurricane (and no adultery will threaten it). How to create such body connected? First of all, support each other. In difficult situations related to the «outside», always try to protect your partner. Do not tell outsiders about secrets of your second half, even if on your work they always complain about shortcomings of their family. Make sure that nothing and no one prevents you from spending time alone with each other. To do this, they invented answering machine and locks on doors in bedroom.

Take it as a rule to tell each other about your plans and dreams for half an hour a day. Just remember: it is time not for a conversation on everyday topics and not sort out relationship. Such conversations help couples become friends. And do not forget to find time for intimate relationships. Spontaneity is always welcomed.

Do not miss the case to arrange a small celebration just for you two. To do this, you do not need a serious excuse. The fact that you are still together is worthy to celebrate it. Dine with wife at the same restaurant, where you once made a proposal to her. Or arrange yourself a trip to Paris in the middle of winter. You deserve it.

3. Remember: everyone has his flaws

When you are angry, upset, a temptation to blame the second half is great. You believe that your partner must change something in himself.

This is a dead-end road. Trying to change your partner, you thereby force him or take a defensive position, and keep a role of passive observer for yourself. And the result? No one is changing. All are unhappy. In addition, imposing blame for family problems only on your partner, you ignore positive qualities he has.

The right way: try to change yourself. When you acknowledge your own shortcomings and pay attention to merits of your partner, a miracle will happen. You will learn to look at life with great optimism. Your partner will be aware he is valuable, and from this he will feel more comfortable with you. And you both will get a stimulus to change in such a way, that you would become feeling even better together.

Use a Japanese philosophy of imperfection - «vabi sabi», which can be applied to everyday life in the best way. The next time your husband or wife drives you crazy, take a deep breath, say quietly «vabi sabi» and remind yourself that his/her intentions were the best, even if the result does not make you happy. Think about good traits of your partner.

And finally, accept your own imperfections. Sometimes we blame ourselves in all shortcomings of our marriage. Hypertrophied guilt binds hands and feet. Therefore, think about your merits and say: «I am careful - yesterday I gave husband the last biscuit» or «I’m honest - I always say her what I think».

4. More life

A Classic advice that psychologists typically give to single people looking for a half: to find «the very unique», be «one of the only». The same is applied to marriage. The happier you are, the happier your family life will be and the easier you will be able to resolve conflicts. Think about what can bring you appeasement: yoga in the morning, a cup of coffee and maybe a new hobby? Your good mood and feel will benefit your marriage and make moments you spend together unique.

And then recognize: once you cared of your hair and chose lingerie meticulously. Now, you wear faded athletic pants and an old T-shirt. It is time to deal with your appearance. Make a hairstyle, put on a new dress. When you like how you look, you have luster in eyes. You want to look into the eyes of your chosen one. And then, this spark is given to him.

5. Fight fairly

Conflict is a normal part of any marriage. What is important is how you enable it. With the right approach to a situation, conflict may further narrow the gap between spouses - you see that you are loved and accepted, so you begin to understand vulnerable heart of your partner. Thus, you publicly express your emotions, both parties have an opportunity to strengthen their union.

During conflict, try to avoid criticism, confrontation and hostility. They only add fuel to the fire. Happy couples are trying to peacefully settle disputes, not using such words as «never», or «always». Try to change the subject, make a joke of everything, let your partner understand that despite the rift, you love and appreciate him.

6. Choose right time and place

Do not start a conversation on a sore topic, if you’re tired or hungry. Hunger and fatigue can cause a very sharp observations and unfair conclusions. Do not get into these conversations, if you drank.

Do not even try to solve serious issues, while doing something else: turn off the TV, phone and computer. If something prevents you from concentration, or you need to go somewhere, then talk another time. It is impossible to resolve a conflict on the run.

Remember: the way you behave yourself in such situations affects not only you. Do you mind your expressions? Can you ever resist a scandal? If not, try to stop in time - you will be able to continue, when children are absent. Studies show that if parents decide constructively, their children succeed later in life and not experience problems with communication, and vice versa, if children are constant witnesses of noisy scenes, it is detrimental to their self-esteem and behavior.

7. Learn to listen

There is one extremely effective way to strengthen marriage: talk less, listen more. Mutual accusations, insults, criticism and threats bring to a fall. When a conversation turns into a vicious exchange of attacks, do not try to immediately interrupt a speaker, do not jump to conclusions and do not throw defense. When it comes to feelings, a person needs to be heard. Therefore, in response, give a nod, or rephrase partner’s words, or as let him somehow know that you respect his feelings. Sometimes, in order to restore spiritual intimacy, you need only to be more attentive to your partner’s words.